Before I begin let me tell you that the purpose of this letter is not to hurt you again (since sabi mo isa ka sa mga nasaktan ko), not to remind you why I didn’t give you the chance that you asked for and not to refresh your memory of all the heartaches that I caused you since you started to like me. And please don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to sound “feelingera” or something. Haha!
The main purpose of this letter is to make you understand it more why it didn’t work out or why I didn’t give you the chance to prove yourself to me. And hopefully, at the end of this letter you will find yourself moving on (just in case you’re still in the same place where it ended before it even began) and enjoying what life has in store for you.
I would like to apologize for hurting you or for breaking your heart in any way. Please know that there is no easy way to break somebody’s heart and my heart breaks a little every time I break one too. But, it’s not an excuse to play with people’s feelings or give them false hopes just to avoid hurting them. One day you’ll thank me for breaking yours when you finally found THE ONE. You’ll understand why it didn’t work out with somebody else. A friend once told me “Ang love hindi yan exam na pwedeng pag-aralan.” No offense but we can never convince our heart to beat for a person that doesn’t make our hearts beat faster than usual. Some people are really better off as friends. You know what I realized? I realized that there will really come a time that we will fall in love with someone who pushes us away. After everything, they will be forever known as the person who we couldn’t get to love us no matter what we do and it normally hurts more than the heartbreak we got from broken relationships. But, never ever let it erase all the memories of those who loved you in the past. Just because a particular person didn’t love you back doesn’t mean you are not worthy of someone else’s love because you are. When someone rejected you or turned you down it doesn’t mean that something is wrong with you. It just means that someone else is made for you and it’s not that person whom you desire. Love gives us the power to choose whether we will hurt or love someone. And, hurting you doesn’t make me a bad person. I am not apologizing for being true to myself and to you; I am apologizing for your pain caused by my honesty. I believe that someday it’s gonna make sense and you should believe that too. I am sorry for disappointing you and if I gave you false hope and wrong signals at some point. I am sorry if I turned you down for so many times. I am sorry for all the invitations that I declined and I am sorry if I can’t like you the same way that you do. Nothing’s wrong with you. You are fine. Maybe you are just made for someone else. Maybe someone else deserves the love you have to offer and I hope you meet her soon.
I would also like to thank you for your appreciation. I never wanted to call it “love” because love is such a deep word and it takes time before you can actually say that you love a person. I appreciate that you appreciate me because not everyone does. I appreciate how you notice the little things about me, how you notice that something is wrong based on my FB posts; I appreciate how you notice the little changes I made with myself and you never fail to make sure that I know it. You noticed when I cut my hair and told me it suits me, you notice it when something’s wrong and you always find the courage to ask why. I appreciate how much you paid attention on little things about me. I appreciate your effort to make me feel special in any way you can. I don’t know if I already thanked you for that but just in case I haven’t, here it is, thank you.
To end this, I wish you all the best in life and in love. Nobody deserves to get hurt and be stuck on that painful scenario forever so I hope that you love again. I hope that someday, you will bike around somewhere, you’ll stumble and by the time you get up you will see the girl of your dreams extending her hand to help you get up from the ground. I hope that you will reach for her hand and you will let her help you. Everybody deserves to be loved. There is someone waiting for you at the end of the road and that someone is some kind of reward for all the heartaches that you’ve been through from the past for loving the wrong ones. You deserve that love because you earned it. Once you find this love, hold on to it. This kind of love won’t ever leave you behind. You are entitled to this awesome kind of love so go get it. It’s yours. Wait for it. It will be epic. I assure you that. May God bless you and your heart.